The Do’s And Don’ts When Stressed

The Do’s And Don’ts When Stressed

Everyone experiences some degree of stress at some point in their lives. Some stress is minimal and is resolved easily and other times it is long standing and consumes your life.

Stress doesn’t necessarily become a problem until you find yourself in an unhealthy or unbearable situation that you can’t get any relief from.

So, I am going to give you a short list of the Do’s And Don’ts When Stressed that will help you gain control of your thoughts and emotions.



  1. Breathe (Tap here to download Video 1 of the  Zap Stress in 5 Video)
    Your breath is the greatest gift of Source that is taken for granted. Breathing is the number one thing you can do to ground yourself, relieve tension, calm down, and slow down your busy thoughts.

    A few deep breathes will immediately shift your disposition when practiced a few times and exercised regularly.

     Where ever you are, simply notice your feet, wiggle your toes, and breathe in for
     four, hold for four and release for four.

2.   Step away from the stressor
When you feel yourself escalating, getting tense, breathing fast, feeling hot and
      sweaty, or feeling triggered (agitated, rolling your eyes, and cursing people in your
      mind) it’s time to step away from the situation.

      This is the perfect opportunity to take a break.

You could:

The idea here is to identify all the things that you can do when you need a healthy distraction. Make a list of things that make you smile and generally feel good. Open your notes in your phone and jot these down so you’ll have them when you need them.

3.   Affirm yourself

      In stressful situations it’s easy to go down a road of negativity by only focusing on
      what is not right or working for you in the given situation. So, here are a few
      affirmations  to help you shift your focus.    

  • I am free of all stress and tension
  • I am in control of my life and chose to feel peaceful
  • As I slow my breathing and relax my body, the stress flows out of my mind
  • I choose to react positively to the situation I’m faced with
  • This situation is neither good or bad, it simply is.
  • I feel calm and centered
  • I am equipped to handle this situation effectively.
  • Feeling relaxed is my normal state
  • I forgive myself for the mistakes I have made in the past

Of course this is just a sample of affirmations and Louis Hay is a master in this area.   You are also free to add your flavor and create your own affirmations as well. 


1. Drink (drug, eat, or sex it away)
A glass of wine or a yummy cocktail maybe your favorite go to when feeling stressed and wanting to chill out. Well, this could be problematic as alcohol is a depressant and ultimately numbs you out. Alcohol is habit forming and down right addictive so the issue here is, you will find that your regular 1-2 drinks will increase over time as your body will require more to achieve the initial level of chill.

Not everyone is a happy drinker. And many are more likely to dwell on negativity and have dark thoughts that will only make their perception of the stressful situation worse.

Furthermore, alcohol isn’t the best sleep aide as our bodies begin to withdrawal from the downer within a 3-4 hours of consumption which means you will have a poor nights rest. It affects your ability to achieve REM Sleep and without this, you will not experience deep quality rest. 

Instead, try replacing your alcoholic beverages with natural drinks such as herbal teas. Chamomile, Peppermint, Spearmint, Kava, Lemon Balm and Ginseng are all very soothing and flavorful.

2.   Control

Resist the urge to control things that are outside of your control. Instead focus on you and what you need to get your mind right quickly so that you are not spinning out and making mountains of out mole hills.

A lot of your precious energy goes into resisting what is, and trying to force your will onto  or into situations that aren’t your business.

Let’s face it. People are going to be who they are, and show up in the world exactly that.

It’s okay to let things be and allow situations to take their natural course.

3.   Dwell

You must control your thoughts. When you dwell, you play the situation out in your mind over and over again. It’s important to know that when you are stuck in a negative loop, this is no longer about the stressful situation. This is about you being triggered.

It’s time to break the habit of pointing fingers and finding fault in others.

Ask yourself, “what triggered me?” What am I feeling right now? When have I felt this feeling before?

By spending quality time with yourself, you will find an answer. And you will learn that your negative emotions existed within you for a long time. Therefore, your current situation is only a trigger. That person or that thing, just happened to push your hot button that needs some attention and healing. 

Learn what your triggers are as it will help you control your anger and manage your emotions.

So tell me, which of these steps will you incorporate into your life moving forward?


Just in case you are looking for some additional help managing your stress, I have a 30-Minute Video E-Course called Zap Stress in 5 Minutes, available for immediate download.

Desi Wenzel

Desi Wenzel is a Self Care Consultant and Mindset Coach helping overwhelmed, overworked superwomen find their joy, peace of mind, and passion for life and her business through Digital Courses, Coaching and Retreats.










Thank you for reading!
You are welcome to join the Self Care In Action Community to receive additional learnings and offers on self-care while managing your business. 

Yes, I want to join the community.

50% Complete

Two Step

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.